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  • Writer's pictureJordan Drayer

Can You Shelve Your Agenda?


Yesod of Hod


Hi everyone, Jordan Drayer, the savvy millennial voice actress who bonds through humility. Today is three weeks and six days of the Omer. If you want to know more about the Omer and how it works, check out the links in the description.


Today is Yesod of Hod, bonding through humility. It didn't seem so to me before this, but being humble leads to bonds. Actually, this is commitment in a relationship. You learn how to let another be the more important as the situation requires. Maybe you're really tired and just want to sleep, but your spouse is sad and needs to talk. You have to let them be the more important person, if you really love them, and just put up with being tired for now.


Or say you're sure blue is the best color for a room, but you still want the other to feel they had a say. So you ask. Even if you still end up choosing blue in the end, at least you made them feel like they contributed, which will make them like and trust you more (provided you didn't force them or put their choice down with snide remarks).


If you're ever too humble, always deferring to others and letting them choose, then they'll never get to know you, and how is that bonding? I get annoyed at people who won't share in 12-step groups. I know, I know, they're allowed to share when they're ready and comfortable. But if meeting after meeting, they continue to pass, they look like someone unable to take up their proper space.


Again, i get it, some people are so battered, they don't know how to take up space. And I'm speaking from a place of privilege of being able to talk and feel safe talking. I'm grateful for all the people that've helped me to get here. So maybe I'm annoyed they're not helping us get to know them because I'm annoyed at myself of the past, or some meta stuff like that. Anyway, if you're in a 12-step group, open up and share! At least say, "I'm glad to be here."


Okay, so I go off on weird tangents. Today's exercise is to use your humility to build something lasting. Let your spouse choose the next outing or restaurant, or even your kids. I could actually speak up more and let my boss and co-workers know how I appreciate them, get everyone doughnuts on first Fridays or something. And I humbly ask, please like and share. I'll see you tomorrow.

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